by Dan Nolan
As the cold winter winds creep across Los Angeles, the weekly festival of fire-spitting know as Roast Battle returns to the Belly Room to warm your black hearts with six hot fights.
For our judges’ panel we’ve got frequent fliers of the Belly Room battles and co-hosts of our NYC spinoff with Luis J. Gomez and Mike Lawrence. Mike is the current world champion until at least January and Luis makes his debut as a battler on this year’s Road to Roast Battle fighting from New York. Rounding things out is Brody Stevens, a Comedy Store favorite whose résumé boasts appearances on Chelsea Lately, Ridiculousness, and his own show on Comedy Central, Enjoy It! With a panel as good as this, one can only hope that the battlers rise to the occasion so they don’t get ripped apart by these vicious VIPs.
First up in our undercards is a Roast Battle virginity-swap between Boston’s Anthony Amorello and Brett Eby of Madison, Wisconsin. Eby touts a mere four mutual friends with me on Facebook and zero pictures of himself holding a microphone, but shares a hometown with Roast Battle bad-boy Mike Schmidt, so hopefully he’ll be able to bring some of that same Mad City heat. Anthony “Ten Mutual Friends” Amorello was among the elite 270+ comics accepted into Flappers’ Burbank Comedy Festival this past year, so along with jokes this evening he will be expected to bring 8-12 friends.
Our second all-newbie undercard pits Long Beach’s Marty Wurst against Orange County comic Michael Huebner. Both comics are transplants from LA-satellite scenes with sporadic appearances in town over the years so the Belly Room shouldn’t be too intimidating. Will Huebner manage to best Marty Wurst? We’ll found our tonight.
Third up is the return of the 0-1 Isak Allen against newcomer and fellow San Diego-transplant, Austin Train. Isak’s debut showed a lot of promise even with a loss against fellow doorguy Steven Furey. Isak’s roastability has diminished somewhat as he has since gotten rid of the Mohawk, however he does appear to have remained Asian, which could come back to hurt him. “Austin Train” sounds like something Isak’s ancestors laid the rail lines for, and hopefully both battlers will come ready to lay down some dope lines of their own tonight.
Stepping up off the bench again is the Negro Wave’s own Haiti to take on the Hudson Valley’s Marcus Givan. Haiti has stepped into the ring before most recently sharing ¼th of The Wave’s loss against the Virzi Triplets a few weeks back. With Haiti as one of the few, or possible only battlers for whom English is a second language, Marcus should hope to capitalize on the language struggles that have in the past has been his downfall, though this is a show that loves underdogs and upsets.
In our final undercard of the evening, Brendan Cooney makes a return to take on Logan Guntzelman after she debuted just a few weeks back in one of the best undercard performances of this past year. Cooney’s career goes much farther back touting two main events with one victory and another controversial loss, though he remained inactive for a long time before a recent return with a win in the undercards. He’s one of the best kept secrets of Roast Battle. Logan showed about as much promise as anyone could in a debut undercard and with both battlers possessing a signature dry, deadpan delivery it’s really set to be a great matchup.
For our final fight, Tom Goss is back to take on two-time Battler of the Year Keith Carey. Tom’s probably one of the most underrated writers in the show, standing currently just outside the rankings’ tope ten bubble. Tom and Keith both are among the show’s most talented and most roastable, and both battlers have given and taken a lot of the show’s greatest hits. Keith has more than twice the experience in the ring, but a win from Tom wouldn’t exactly feel like am upset.
It’s another full fight card for some no-holds-barred verbal carnage in the Belly Room. Let’s roast!
Follow @RoastBattle on Twitter for all the latest updates, check out our Instagram and Facebook pages for the latest pictures from the impeccable Troy Conrad, and watch live on Periscope at 11 PM PST every Tuesday if you can’t catch the verbal violence in person. Thank you for reading, and thanks as always to our sponsor SpeedWeed.