It’s week 52, people! After a long year of heartache, we’ve reached the dumpiversary of one Erik Marino! The Great Photog sure is giving us some sweet angles. Last week, Erik took the stage with great comedians/friends Terrence Newman, Jordan Perry and Neel Nanda. Not only are they good guys and funny people, they brought their musical talents to accompany the woes of Marino. Check out all of their things and stuff, including Neel’s Stand-Up and Dance party this Saturday if you’re in LA.
Here we have a couple of Roast Report favs in Matt Broussard (0-1, 90) and Sugar Sean Leary (1-0, 47). Way back when they battled, I declared I would take the winner. Broussard lost and then lost again in Montreal at Just for Laughs to Jimmy Carr. Well, the time has come. Next week, Sean will join me on stage for battle and will likely give the same super creepy look. That means Jay Light, (7-3, 5) will be taking over preview and review duties. You want a glimpse of Jay’s roast coverage? Check out his write-up of our east coast iteration, The Roastmasters! It’s at The Stand in NYC. Check out their site for more info! Lastly, check out the new pod to learn of the origin of the Negro Wave!
Alright, let’s preview.
Woo! The Roastmaster takes a break from the prestigious Oddball Festival to judge an excellent night of battles! You can fInd out when he and the rest of the odd balls will be in your area here. This photo came courtesy of the Detroit Pistons Twitter account. It must be nice for Jeff to be in Detroit because he probably doesn’t have more money than other major cities he visits. Make sure you’re peeping his latest special and come see what he has in store for tonight.
A hot night of battles wouldn’t be complete without last year’s Judge(s) of the Year, the Sklar Brothers! What a precious picture that’s available to anyone within a thumb’s reach of Google. I can’t stress enough how funny these two are. They usually come for the undercards and crack wise. Make sure you’re checking their latest Netflix special and find out all their goings-on on their site and Twitter.
It’s only fitting that a fellow headliner and battler be around for tonight, so let’s be glad Guy Branum was available! Guy most recently dispatched our champion Joe Dosch (6-2, 1) despite a heroic effort from Joe. Guy has an album called “Effable” that’s worth a listen. He was on @midnight on an episode with one of our Main Event battlers. This is great pic of Guy. I had no idea the studios were considering a plus sized Lex Luthor for the Superman reboot.
The first of the scheduled undercards is Haiti (0-0, UR) versus Eric Carter (0-1, 114)!
This should be a very interesting battle! Haiti, not the country, is pretty funny. The country has beed kinda sad for a while. Haiti’s become a pretty central part of the Wave but that’s more because of his dreadlocks and insane physique that can only be acquired from rebuilding a devastated hometown. Everyone where he’s from has that tank top or a 2015 Cavaliers NBA champion shirt. Eric Carter is seen here wearing poor life decisions and a nice suit. Normally I wouldn’t pick a person without Twitter. But since we tagged Haiti as #Haiti I’ll pick him to raise awareness. This is just a Roast Report. Nothing is personal.
Carl Spitale (1-1, 85) will be squaring up against Jon Schabl (1-1, 44) in this undercard!
They have the same record but are separated by for spots on the rankings. Oh, Committee. How do you do what you do? Part of it is watching on Periscope, so make sure you’re doing the same if you can’t make the show! I wasn’t able to make Carl’s first battle and it was before Periscope. I watched his second battle, a loss to Brent Duncan (2-2, 42), where he didn’t so much battle as flailed about at a high volume. Jon sits at .500 as well but has impressed more in his battles. He’s also happily married so he wins again. He’s also about to be a dad so he lost again. That’s .500 for ya. The pick is Jon.
The next undercard pits Seth Woodward (0-1, 107) against Joe Eurell (0-0, UR)!
Last time we saw Joe Eurell, he was left at the roast altar by Ashley Barnhill (6-1, 8). He had some good burns for the former ladies champ and I know he’ll have more tonight. The last time we saw Seth Woodward, Dan Lewis Fawcett (1-0, 60) was mopping the Belly Room floor with him. He wasn’t bad, DLF was just much better. He deserves another chance but I think he’ll be falling to 0-2.
The fourth undercard of the night puts Jordan Leer (0-1, 113) against Kevin Fard (0-0, UR)!
This should be a…battle. Jordan lost a tight one to RAAB (1-0, 75) a while back but had a good showing. Kevin is a Roast Battle virgin but a good comedian. I was going to go to Twitter to see what we might be in store for but Kevin’s was just promo for his podcast and Jordan’s was like if a Keystone Light could type. He had one good tweet about Harry Potter and for that alone he gets the pick. Not to go all Mr. Leer but don’t you let me down again, Jordan.
And our Main Event is a doozy. A headliner battle between Mike Lawrence (1-0-1, 5) and Dan St. Germain (0-1, 13)!
That’s right! Two of our favorite judges are stepping into the ring! Between Boon’s wig and these two, we have a regular ginger-palooza on our hands. This should be an early favorite for Battle of the Year. These two are some of the funniest dudes that have ever been involved in the show. I know their jokes will crush but I’m really looking forward to off the cuff moments between them and the judges. Both are great are pulling out a spot-on joke for any situation that occurs. Both have been on Conan and @midnight. Mike has an album called “Sadamantium” you should check out and Dan’s is called “Bad at the Good Times”. DO NOT MISS THIS BATTLE…that I think Mike will win.
I am 46-31 in picks. Yea, I’m the only one keeping track. Wanna fight about it? Thanks as usual for reading and coming to the show. Listen to the podcast! Keep with the ranks! Headliner ranks too! Shout to the Great Photog for the beautiful photos. Follow us on the only IG backed by the Report, tweet us@roastbattle or email firstname.lastname@example.org for questions/concerns/other stuff.